Thankful Much

Sometimes I find myself being thankful about the most off-the-wall things.

This morning -- not so much -- it was a pretty normal thing I was thankful for. Just hot water. You know that feeling that takes your heartbeat away when the water in the shower isn't quite up to temp. yet? Well, it only lasted a few short minutes, long enough to make me thankful for the hot water we have. I normally don't think about stuff like that, but it must have set me off in the thankful mood or something. And tonight I relized that thanksgiving is only a few short days away -- how fitting. Since I never participate in the "rage" of those thankful posts for the month of November, I might as well get my thankful thoughts out all at once, while I'm on a roll. ;)

So this is when my thanksgivings shift a little more to different things - you know, to all the complicated things in my life that God has blessed me with, but I don't even understand them, I can't fathom them yet. 

At work, I've been learning to be more of the type of person that people don't forget. Not in a selfish or vain way... But I only say that because there have been complete strangers in my life that I will never forget simply because they made me feel special. Anyway, that's one of my biggest goals right now... And today I found myself feeling thankful for learning another little lesson on how to brighten someone's day. It was actually waiting in the drive through after the person taking my order really misunderstood me. I didn't really care so I pulled up to the window anyway. The thing was, I waited forever for the most piddling little thing. Finally I turned my car off because I was waisting gas. I knew that it would have probably indicated to those inside that I was tired of waiting and if it was going to camping out her for another half hour, I might as well turn off my car. Yeah, so I was slightly irritated that it was taking ten minutes in a fast food drive through for one simple thing but I really wasn't that upset. When they gave me my food and apologized for the wait, all I said was, "thank you," and I started my car and left. Immediately, I knew that I could have practiced some of that "make people not forget you power" and who knows? -- maybe I would have turned a bad night on the job into a good one! Really all it would have taken was a smile, assuring them that it was no problem at all, then saying thank you. And I find that sometimes a smile is the biggest key, since they are after all contagious. :)

Well, today was also the second day that one of my sweet cousins stopped by and gave me something at work... This time it was chocolate (yum!) and the thoughtfulness of it just melted my heart that someone would just think of me when they are out and about? :) yeah, just terribly sweet!

That's not an odd thing to be thankful about either, but it does trigger a different level of thankfulness in me... It makes me thankful for humanity, and the little ways our hearts feel and perceive love. It's just a beautiful thing -- something I can't comprehend at times.

Another thing I'm so thankful for, and something I can't understand, is the plan God has for my life. There are places I want to go, things I want to accomplish, and a woman of good character that I want to become... And sometimes the thought of it wants to weigh I me because those three things right there reminds me that a lot of my life is up in the air right now. I feel like I'm barely getting to the point where I can start accomplishing some of it in the near future and it might be scary to think that one moments decision can change it all. But... 99% of the time I am just excited for the future and thankful that God really has a good plan for my life. And a quote my Sunday school teacher gave us:

"God gives his best to those who leave the choice with Him."

One last thing... ;) I'm thankful for animals: monkeys, elephants, puppies, big wild cats, and then your good old regular kitty-cat. They just make my heart bigger! :) Most of that is in reference so some of Devin Graham's latest videos in Nepal. I mean seriously... how cute is this monkey at 1:12 of this video???

Well, it's Thanksgiving and I didn't even realize how spot-on my thoughts were to the season...

Anyone else have any to share?

-MarLeahJoy 

To Everything There is a Season

So, I admit. I haven't been as content with the place in life that I am in like I should be.

It's all about school... college. I really don't like it at all.

It's not like it takes that much time, but I just can't focus on it. Which, in turn, makes for a lot of procrastination and wasted time.

Tonight has led me through a series of thoughts on this matter.

1) My mom advised me to try to have a better attitude about doing my homework. Which I scoffed at, but I know that it will solve a lot of things if I do...

2) I was looking through my Flickr account (that I haven't posted to since the fourth of July) :/

I found this old gem.

Yeah, that was like the best little camping trip. Just me and my cousin, but it was awesome because I took photos the whole time.

3) I was going to post this picture here on my blog and whine and complain about how I can't do what I really love to do because of school. But then I stopped and realized that maybe this season is a blessing after all. Because it is showing me what I really love to do. Where I should be. And what my focus should be on. 

Honestly, that's something a lot of people don't figure out until their mid 20's.

I know that I certainly have had my struggles with photography. Wondering if I really love it, or if it's just a little hype-thing that I'm going through that will pass. But....

Sometimes they say that distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Well, I think it's true. 

-MarLeahJoy

Yep, life and it's seasons... sometimes all I can do is shake my head and smile.

Most of my smiling is at my humanity and small understanding, though.

All I Can Do is Smile

I've never had someone do something for me and feel so much like God had a hand in it.

Today, we had a rough time closing up the bank, but we finally got out of there nearly an hour late. I had a cloud of dread hanging over my head because something was wrong that I had done that day and I didn't catch it until time to close. So all I could do is just hope that tomorrow, when management looks everything over, the issue will turn up and everything will be okay. But I know good and well that that might not. 

When I first realized there was a problem, naturally my thoughts turned straight to God and I started asking of Him that He would fix it and make everything right. But just as this song says, so many times we ask God to be with us in our times of distress, yet we haven't been close to him in all the other times. As I was crying out to God, I thought of this whole week and how I really haven't spent much time with the Lord because I've let homework and the cares of life take away from that special time with Him. So I was kind of like, "Well, I really don't feel like I have much room to ask for him to make everything to be just okay", though I know God can still do it if we truly have a repentant heart and if it is part of the lesson He wants to teach us. 

Needless to say, I was leaving work feeling gloomy, and it was really dark and cold outside to add to it. As I got to my car, I saw something was on the windshield of my car and I hollered back to my co-worker that someone had left me something. It was some flowers and candy from my cousin, and so I was like "How did she know I was having a rough night?!?" My co-worker and I just laughed at the irony of it and then parted ways. Of course, I knew that she had no way of knowing, but God did!

On my way home, I was thinking about it, and God just let me know that if He could orchestrate so that someone would think of me and send me a special gift on the same day that something went wrong, that he already knew all about the situation and it would be okay. And I can't even fathom what it means for God to know ALL about it -- that's a lot of "knowing"! ;) But it give me a calm assurance about the whole thing, that it would all be okay no matter how it turned out.

Then, as I pulled into the garage, and looked over to pick up the flowers and carry them in, I was just overwhelmed with the love of God. That He would really love me so much to give me flowers. Oh, it was such a wonderful thought! I know some people might argue though that it wasn't God -- it was just my cousin being nice to me. No, God works through the hands of his children. I'm also not trying to discount the kindness of my cousin, either. But it was just so strongly impressed on me that it was God who did it, he really cares and wants to have a relationship with me just as if He were my best friend here on this earth. 

Maybe I'll just leave it at that, because my mind can't even really take it all in right now. I'm overwhelmed with it all, because it is also a direct answer to the desire I've had in my heart to really know God like a friend, a really close friend.  :)

-MarLeahJoy 

Fall

There is nothing like the pure joy of a child.

-MarLeahJoy